Wish could See Life from People's Eye

If previously I miss how I was in the past seeing life and future, now I wish I could see life and future from other normal people's eye.

Life must not have empty. Soul must be fulfilled. There must be an optimistic future. I really lost whats this life for.

I need that positive spirit, as how I saw in the past and as how other people's see now. That energy to support family, that energy to earn money, to get good job, to be good at work, to learn, to write, to save money, to buy goods, to buy foods, to meet people, to share for the poor, to help people, to do goods for akhirat, to be filled with wishes for the future.

To not have negative thought over people, to not feel low, to not feel judged, to feel that people is fine with you. Just feel normal. Yes normal as others do. Where am I?